Irresistible Refrain Read online

  “When a Man Loves a Woman” began to play over the sound system, but my blurry eyes, my heart, my soul were all focused on him. He’d never looked so handsome or so serious. His hair was un-gelled, the longer strands resting against his forehead. A tuxedo black jacket hugged his broad shoulders, a white shirt and black silk tie underneath. Black trousers moved fluidly against his thighs as he walked toward me his hand outstretched, his grey green eyes beckoning with deep emotion.

  “You look wonderful, Lace.”

  I put my hand in his, a surge of warmth blushing my cheeks as soon as we touched. He led me out to the middle of the dance floor. I moved into his arms, inhaling deeply, my senses flooded with the familiar spicy scent of him. I licked my suddenly dry lips.

  His presence, his hands on my bare skin, the strength of his shoulders beneath my fingertips, the evening, the way I felt about him, all of it, made me sway a bit as if I were a little tipsy.

  I drew in a shaky breath and gazed up at him. His eyes were heavy lidded, his face drawn tight with desire I was sure matched my own.

  He closed in. I didn’t resist.

  The time for caution was over. This man had me from the moment he’d made that first silly face when I was five. I’d only gotten a tiny glimpse of his tender heart back then, but it had been more than enough to completely rock my world. He was the constant in my life, my irresistible refrain. I could no more keep myself from needing, wanting, or returning to him than I could keep myself from breathing.

  It was always going to be him.

  Our bodies brushed together, hard against soft, the silk of my dress rustling between us. I felt a shudder run through him. His warm hands made me shiver as they slid down my arms and came to rest in the small of my back.

  His eyes burned into mine as he held me close. “Lace, I made a huge mistake in Orlando.” His voice was deep and thick with regret. “I should have been supportive instead of putting pressure on you by throwing down an ultimatum like that.”

  I held onto his forearms to steady myself just as I’d done that day on the beach when he’d first kissed me. My head was spinning as if I’d just gotten off the tilt a whirl ride. “What exactly are you saying?” I whispered.

  He blew out a ragged breath. “I had it all planned out, but I’m finding it really difficult to think straight, let alone make the kind of speech you deserve when I’ve got you in my arms like this.” He took a step back, not much, about an inch, but enough that I suddenly felt bereft without the delicious warmth of his body pressed against me.

  He reached in his jacket pocket and I held my breath, eyes filling instantly when I saw what he held.

  “Oh my God.” My wide eyes met his. “Is that what I think it is?”

  He nodded.

  The ribbon I’d worn around my neck on prom night.

  I stared at him in dazed wonder.

  “Lace Lowell, I love you. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known, and I want you to know that I’ve always had faith in you, even when you lost your way. I know that you’re no weak minded princess in need of a rescue, and that’s ok because I’m no prince. It’s really me who needs the rescue, from a life that means absolutely nothing to me if you’re not in it.” His hands moved softly through my hair and his eyes traced over my features as if he was committing them to memory.

  “What I believe in most is the two of us. We’re better than any fairy tale. And if you want me to wait for a day, or a month, or a year for you, until you’re ready for us to begin our life together, I’ll do it. But just like I’ve been doing for the past several weeks, I’m gonna do it right up here in Vancouver where I can watch over you.” His eyes blazed with intensity. “You know me. I protect what’s mine.”

  Holy shit.

  I didn’t say that out loud. Hello. I have much more princess class than that.

  I didn’t need any more time to think it over. He was right. I could take care of myself. I knew that now. That impediment to our being together was out of the way. And I didn’t need…

  Fairy god mothers,

  or enchanted coaches,

  or even glass slippers.

  I just needed him.

  Bryan.

  His faith in me was all the magic I would ever need.

  “I’m ready now, Bry.” I took the ribbon from him, pulled it taut in both my hands, held it across my neck, and turned around. Bowing my head, I offered him the loose ends to tie.

  I felt him breathe my name across my neck. I felt his rough finger tips tremble as they brushed across my bare skin. I felt the cool silk ribbon tighten as he fastened it around me. And I felt his lips drop a soft kiss on the tender skin between my neck and shoulder after his task was complete.

  Bryan turned me around to face him. His dark possessive gaze swept warmth over me before his lips claimed mine in a deep hot wet kiss.

  Bleep. The sound of an incoming text.

  “I think that’s your phone,” I whispered breathlessly as he rained passionate kisses up and down the column of my throat.

  “Mmm,” he groaned without pausing from his tender assault on my fevered skin. “Forget it. Tonight’s just for us.” He pulled me closer, slid the cell from his pocket, and tossed it on a nearby table without reading the message.

  The End

  COMING SOON

  Book 2

  (Estimated release date - April 2014)

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  HEROIN FACTS PROVIDED BY THE NATIONAL INSTITUTE ON DRUG ABUSE

  Heroin is an opioid drug that is synthesized from morphine, a naturally occurring substance extracted from the seed pod of the Asian opium poppy plant. Heroin usually appears as a white or brown powder or as a black sticky substance, known as “black tar heroin.”

  In 2011, 4.2 million Americans aged 12 or older (or 1.6 percent) had used heroin at least once in their lives. It is estimated that about 23 percent of individuals who use heroin become dependent on it.

  HOW IS HEROIN USED?

  Heroin can be injected, inhaled by snorting or sniffing, or smoked. All three routes of administration deliver the drug to the brain very rapidly, which contributes to its health risks and to its high risk for addiction, which is a chronic relapsing disease caused by changes in the brain and characterized by uncontrollable drug-seeking no matter the consequences.

  HOW DOES HEROIN AFFECT THE BRAIN?

  When it enters the brain, heroin is converted back into morphine, which binds to molecules on cells known as opioid receptors. These receptors are located in many areas of the brain (and in the body), especially those involved in the perception of pain and in reward. Opioid receptors are also located in the brain stem, which controls automatic processes critical for life, such as blood pressure, arousal, and respiration. Heroin overdoses frequently involve a suppression of breathing, which can be fatal.

  After an intravenous injection of heroin, users report feeling a surge of euphoria (“rush”) accompanied by dry mouth, a warm flushing of the skin, heaviness of the extremities, and clouded mental functioning. Following this initial euphoria, the user goes “on the nod,” an alternately wakeful and drowsy state. Users who do not inject the drug may not experience the initial rush, but other effects are the same.

  Regular heroin use changes the functioning of the brain. One result is tolerance, in which more of the drug is needed to achieve the same intensity of effect. Another result is dependence, characterized by the need to continue use of the drug to avoid withdrawal symptoms.

  INJECTION DRUG USE AND HIV AND HCV INFECTION

  People who inject drugs are at high risk of contracting HIV and hepatitis C (HCV). This is because these diseases are transmitted through contact with blood or other bodily fluids, which can occur when sharing needles or other injection drug use equipment. (HCV is the mos
t common blood-borne infection in the Unites States.) HIV (and less often HCV) can also be contracted during unprotected sex, which drug use makes more likely.

  Because of the strong link between drug abuse and the spread of infectious disease, drug abuse treatment can be an effective way to prevent the latter. People in drug abuse treatment, which often includes risk reduction counseling, stop or reduce their drug use and related risk behaviors, including risky injection practices and unsafe sex. (See box, “Treating Heroin Addiction.”)

  WHAT ARE THE OTHER HEALTH EFFECTS OF HEROIN?

  Heroin abuse is associated with a number of serious health conditions, including fatal overdose, spontaneous abortion, and infectious diseases like hepatitis and HIV (see box, “Injection Drug Use and HIV and HCV Infection”). Chronic users may develop collapsed veins, infection of the heart lining and valves, abscesses, constipation and gastrointestinal cramping, and liver or kidney disease. Pulmonary complications, including various types of pneumonia, may result from the poor health of the user as well as from heroin’s effects on breathing.

  In addition to the effects of the drug itself, street heroin often contains toxic contaminants or additives that can clog blood vessels leading to the lungs, liver, kidneys, or brain, causing permanent damage to vital organs.

  TREATING HEROIN ADDICTION

  A range of treatments including behavioral therapies and medications are effective at helping patients stop using heroin and return to stable and productive lives.

  Medications include buprenorphine and methadone, both of which work by binding to the same cell receptors as heroin but more weakly, helping a person wean off the drug and reduce craving; and naltrexone, which blocks opioid receptors and prevents the drug from having an effect (patients sometimes have trouble complying with naltrexone treatment, but a new long-acting version given by injection in a doctor’s office may increase this treatment’s efficacy). Another drug called naloxone is sometimes used as an emergency treatment to counteract the effects of heroin overdose.

  For more information, see NIDA’s handbook, Principles of Drug Addiction Treatment.

  Chronic use of heroin leads to physical dependence, a state in which the body has adapted to the presence of the drug. If a dependent user reduces or stops use of the drug abruptly, he or she may experience severe symptoms of withdrawal. These symptoms—which can begin as early as a few hours after the last drug administration—can include restlessness, muscle and bone pain, insomnia, diarrhea and vomiting, cold flashes with goose bumps (“cold turkey”), and kicking movements (“kicking the habit”). Users also experience severe craving for the drug during withdrawal, which can precipitate continued abuse and/or relapse.

  Besides the risk of spontaneous abortion, heroin abuse during pregnancy (together with related factors like poor nutrition and inadequate prenatal care) is also associated with low birth weight, an important risk factor for later delays in development. Additionally, if the mother is regularly abusing the drug, the infant may be born physically dependent on heroin and could suffer from neonatal abstinence syndrome (NAS), a drug withdrawal syndrome in infants that requires hospitalization. According to a recent study, treating opioid-addicted pregnant mothers with buprenorphine (a medication for opioid dependence) can reduce NAS symptoms in babies and shorten their hospital stays

  There are real life heroes, and there is hope and help.

  http://www.abovetheinfluence.com/

  Go to the website. Make a difference by supporting the cause.

  Do better. Be better.

  “I’m going to take that chance and I’m going to do better. I’m tired of the roller coaster I’ve been on. I’m tired of all the lies, especially the ones I’ve been telling myself. I really thought I could quit whenever I decided. I realize now that’s not true.”

  –Lace Lowell

  My husband of almost twenty-six years, still rounding up, baby, and my two boys who I promised no more songs and rock biographies about heroin.

  My bff and biggest fan, Lisa Kinzel

  The bff of my heart, Michelle Warren

  My copy editor: Dr. Diane Klein

  My proof reader: Hazeline Paddock-Ng

  My Black Cat Divas: Wendy Neuman Wilkin, Rita Jinkins Post, Tressa Sager, Jamie Sager Hall, April Merriman, Chantelle Stx, and Harvey Gaudun-Stables

  My always & anytime encourager: Kimberly Schaaf

  Dr. Shane Haynes – technical consult

  My longest, dearest fan and literary guide, Mary Humphrey

  Best friends for fun, Kari Novotny and Paige Dejacimo

  Book blogger friends: Mandy Anderson at MandyIreadIndie, Denise Tung at Flirty Dirty Book Blog, Kim Person at Shh Mom’s Reading, Peggy Warren at Le’ BookSquirrel, and Brandee Engle Veltri at Brandee’s Book Endings

  Michelle Mankin is a young/new adult romance writer as well as a self-proclaimed giant... inside of her own mind!

  For many years she worked in the insurance industry as an underwriter. Somehow, the boredom didn't kill her but the hour and hours of looking at facts and figures provided ample time for her mind to wander.

  Black Cat Records in Vancouver provides the central backdrop for all of Michelle’s current novels. Love Evolution, Love Revolution, and Love Resolution are a Brutal Strength centered trilogy, combining the plot underpinnings of Shakespeare with the drama, excitement, and indisputable sexiness of the rock 'n roll industry.

  Things take a bit of a darker, edgier turn with the Tempest series. These pierced, tatted, and troubled Seattle rockers are young and on the cusp of making it big, but with serious obstacles to overcome that may prevent them from ever getting there.

  When Michelle is not prowling the streets of her Texas town listening to her rock music much too loud, she is putting her daydreams down on paper or traveling the world with her family and friends, sometimes for real, and sometimes just for pretend as she takes the children to school and back.

  BRUTAL STRENGTH SERIES:

  Love Evolution

  Love Revolution

  Love Resolution

  CONNECT WITH MICHELLE MANKIN ON:

  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Michelle-Mankin/233503403414065

  On Twitter: https://twitter.com/MichelleMankin

  On her website: http://www.michellemankin.com/